I remember having to give tough feedback to someone I was mentoring at work. He was under-performing and holding the team back. The conversation couldn’t wait.

My first instinct? Be crisp and clear so there’s no mistaking my message.

But before I spoke, I paused and asked myself: “Would I want to hear this in this way?” So, I softened my tone but stayed with the truth.

I started with: “This might be hard to hear, but I believe in you. And that’s why I have to bring this up with you.”

The message didn’t change. But the way I delivered it did. And guess what? The way he received it changed too. Because, afterward, he said: “That was hard to hear. But I get it. And thank you for telling me.”

That’s what kindness does. It delivers the truth in a way that makes it easier for people to hear so someone walks away from a tough conversation thinking: “I need to do better,” instead of “I’m not good enough.” See the difference?

Kindness is like a warm scarf. It doesn’t stop the weather being cold, but it helps a person bear the cold. Because when you wrap a scarf around someone, you’re giving them comfort, warmth, and protection.

That’s exactly what kindness in communication does. It delivers your words in a way that makes people feel safe enough to hear it.

So, here’s the challenge. Before your next difficult team conversation. Ask yourself: “Have I wrapped my words in warmth?”