Some Sunday afternoons, it’s far too hot to venture out, so you make yourself a nice cup of tea, veg out on the sofa and settle into a delicious romcom on Netflix. Nothing that requires any deep thought. Just a heavy dose of romance and a light sprinkling of comedy. Just what I needed for a lazy Sunday afternoon yesterday.
And then I heard the line: “I accept the great adventure of being me.” I jumped up and ran off to grab a pen and a sheet of paper. I just had to write it down. You may not think it profound, but it struck me as a spot-on description of authentic leadership.
Leaders are often under pressure to sound like they think a leader should. They try to be more polished, reaching for impressive word choices, whilst trying to sound more “executive.” It’s all a performance, and somewhere along the way, they begin to sound less human. This tends to happen right after a promotion to an executive position.
It happened to me when I moved from Assistant Solicitor to Associate. I was now handling my own clients. I had more responsibility and authority, and I needed to sound like that. So, my language became more formal, and in communication with clients, I strived to sound more legalistic. More like what an Associate ought to sound like.
The problem was that my clients found it difficult to understand me. Then one “difficult” client walked away. That’s when it clicked. With my heavily formal language, I was the difficult one.
I stopped performing and started to speak more naturally. I learned to explain rather than impress. I allowed my personality to be reflected in my communication. In time, my relationships with clients improved and became noticeably warmer.
In trying so hard to project authority, I had created distance. And many leaders are making the same mistake: trying to be more impressive and more “executive.” In the process, they lose credibility and trust. That’s a big mistake.
What you need as a leader is more authenticity in your communication. People do not need a perfect version of you. They need the real version of you because that’s who they can build a relationship with. That’s who they can trust.
Authenticity is about being clear enough, confident enough, and comfortable enough to let your own voice come through. What’s your experience with authentic communication?
Have you accepted the great adventure of being you?
